‘Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves – slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future. Live the actual moment.’ ~Thich Nhat Hanh
Last year, in my spare moments, I started to Google simplicity. I visited our local library seeking every book they had on the subject. I’m at a place in my life where many of my friends are starting to downsize because their youngest child/children are leaving the nest and although we are YEARS away from our youngest leaving home, a large part of me wants to shift and seek a richer lifestyle. My heart desires less stuff so we can experience more life.
In my quest, I wanted to be inspired with ideas to create a more meaningful lifestyle to raise our younger children. Although our intention was good while raising our older kids, looking back I see that it was centered on a busy, consumer oriented life. We have achieved the “Canadian/American” dream. We have a large home with a pool, the children attend excellent schools and have all sorts of enrichment type activities. We want for nothing, and yet, I feel like A LOT is lacking.
For the last several years I knew that the stuff we had accumulated, which was to make life easier and more fun, wasn’t making us any more joy filled. In fact, it caused more stress since things always need to be repaired, cleaned and maintained. In my quest to look for an alternative path, I was amazed to find that many people all over the world are intensely interested in the same sort of thing. It’s like we are all waking up and seeing that we have bought a used bill of goods. More is less.
During my search, I stumbled across people who live in “Tiny Houses.” These are small houses (usually under 300 square ft) that normally wouldn’t meet building standards but since they are built on trailer beds with wheels, they do not fall under normal building codes but rather under vehicle codes. The people who choose this lifestyle usually have one thing in common; they want more life and less stuff.
I love to take virtual tours of these tiny houses and often lay in bed at night dreaming of how much freedom this would create in my life if we had less square footage. Just imagine, it would take probably minutes to wash a few dishes, make a bed or two (there are even small families in these houses) and clean the tiny, closet like bathroom. Just think, it would be hard to lose anything in this size of house! To me this is luxury living. MAYBE it’s not your idea of nirvana, but there is a huge part of me that desires this life style.
The dream goes back to when my Dad converted a back yard shed and turned it into my playhouse. There was a real stove and cupboards for my little dishes and my baby dolls seemed to really love it there too. I would take dirt and leaves and cook amazing meals on my stove. Outside my house was our garden with butterflies flitting around and there were always a cat or two hanging around, begging to curl up in my lap. Now that is heaven to me.
Sigh!
What has propelled me to start thinking seriously about living more simply? Well……
A few things have, let’s say, been accumulating in my home which is causing some discontent and distress. First, the growing pile of singular socks in my laundry room is driving me wild. Do you have this in your house? Where does the other matching sock go? My kids say that my washer must eat them. I think the likely situation is that the sock attaches itself to another piece of clothing, (since I don’t use static fighting fabric sheets…..I just throw in a lavender soaked rag instead) and then gets put away in someones drawer never to be seen again. (And I have to stress here, there are not just a few socks but a huge pile of singular socks waiting for their partner to appear.) And socks are expensive…especially basketball socks, YIKES!
Also, it seems to take longer and longer each morning to put our house in any semblance of order and that is even when I have asked each child to make their bed and bring their laundry to the wash basket. I don’t know if I’m slowing down but most mornings I feel as if I’m walking through sludge, going room to room straightening things up.
As I sort through my laundry looking for missing socks, I have been pondering my life.
I’m sure my niece, N, who is an efficiency expert with her company would say, “Auntie, the problem is with the number of kids you have.” Hmmmm…. I’m just assuming here of course, but I’m sure most people would say, how can you have a simple life with 8 kids? I did try to Google simple living with a large family and you know what I found? Not much.
So it looks like I’m leading the pack or perhaps there are large families out there but they are having so much fun enjoying living simply, that they don’t see the need to reach out and share their secrets. Maybe, living large “with minimalism” is an oxymoron, but my gut says that there really isn’t a huge contradiction here after all. I think it’s one and the same. Living large is what being a minimalist is all about. We want more LIFE. And I guess since I have 8 kids, it is a play on words but I think it’s possible to have a large family and live simply. I’m kind of excited to share this journey with you…..if you are interested in what we are doing that is.
I did find one book on our library’s list that may help me and once it comes in and I have a chance to read it, I will share the contents with you. I can’t wait!
When 2015 began, I knew I was going to continue to move in the direction of being more sustainable, by growing a large garden, using our resources with care, raising children who are earth conscious but I had no idea that only 2 months into the year, I would be thinking of becoming a minimalist.
A few things have shifted my thinking. First, as I meditate more and feel a greater connection to my soul, I feel expansive. I don’t need things or a large home to feel happy any longer. I want more time to just be in THAT space. Also, I want more time just being with those I love.
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| It’s the simple moments that are precious….the girls sitting on the window seat in awe of another snow day. |
Another inspiration is with regards to our oldest daughter Alyssa. If you read my blog, you know she left last August to teach over in the U.K. As I said goodbye to her at the airport, she was pulling two connected suitcases and had a carry on slung over her shoulder.
I helped her wash and iron the clothes she carefully selected, so I know what she packed. A lot of black. Black pants, tights, a few black dresses, a black skirt and then a stack of different shirts to coordinate with all the bottoms. For the next two years these will be her only possessions. What she desires is experiences. Where is she right now? On her school’s break in Paris.
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| This is all Alyssa is going to have for possessions for the next two years….keep in mind all her career clothes are in these suitcases along with her tablet, her computer, her camera. Could you live out of two suitcases for 2 years? She didn’t even take a book….and she is a book LOVER! |
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| Alyssa in her black London Fog coat …she is capturing life in Europe |
Then our son Mitchell, who is away at University, came home last week for a part of his reading week. He was here for 6 nights and 5 full days and all he brought with him were one pair of pants, two t-shirts, a plaid shirt, a jean jacket and a comfy pair of jersey type pants that he wore to relax and sleep in. He had a great week visiting with his old school friends, he went up skiing with the family, he went to his little brother’s music class and said hello to his old guitar teacher and he even cheered his 16 year old brother, Harrison on during one of his basketball games.We watched movies together and I made many of his favourite meals and desserts.
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| Mitchell being silly with his little sisters..”making memories” |
We had a wonderful week full of fun and made some lasting memories but as he walked up the driveway with only a backpack it occurred to me that my older children have the right idea. They are both living life fully and not encumbered with stuff. Since Mitchell brought only a few items home, there was nothing to maintain and it was a breeze for him to pack again. Mid week, I did throw his clothes in the wash with the rest of the family’s and I think I lost one of his socks too, but other than that there was no effort involved.
Then finally, I was thinking about how I’m about to embark on my yearly, intense spring cleaning session.
Ask the kids how gruelling it is and they will assure you that they would rather be anywhere else but in our house for spring cleaning. I go room to room, de-clutter, clean what items are left and organize our belongings so that there a place for everything. (you know that saying….)
Then I do a deep cleaning in each room. This process normally takes at least a month since my day to day life is usually spent doing our usual maintenance and household upkeep. And finally I perform a space clearing ceremony in our house. I go room to room with some sage/lavender smudge sticks, a feather, a bell, flowers, etc and I bless our home.
Once I have finished with the interior, I take that spring cleaning energy out into the yard. I prune all our shrubs, trees, rake the grass, pick up the debris leftover from winter, sweep all the walkways and driveway. I wash all the windows on the outside of the house and clean our little front yard pond while also setting out our water feature fountain at the front door.
Then I take out all our stored outdoor furniture and set them up; two patio table/umbrella and chair sets, our front yard Adirondack chairs, our red ones for the backyard fire pit, and then I haven’t even started talking about the kids tiny house or the garden/compost (or David opening up our pool and cleaning the hot tub for spring)….I’m exhausted just writing this and I’m sure I forgot a lot………So yeah…..I wish the little house below were MY HOUSE.
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| Our kids playhouse and playground….what would life be like if this was where we lived?…..some families in the world do live in spaces this small. |
Does all this sound familiar to you too? If you have been thinking that you want more life and less stuff too, then we are kindred spirits. Let me share a few really cool Youtube videos that I discovered recently. Maybe you will join me and others around the world in paring down and living more.
It’s not just our stuff, it’s our thoughts, it’s the things we say “yes,” but really want to say, “sorry, no.” It’s the activities we register our children in, creating another generation of people who don’t know how to slow down. It’s even as simple as our breathing. When was the last time you took a really deep, slow breath?…instead of tons of shallow ones?
Well, I’ve been staying up late listening to some really wise people talk about the minimalist movement and I hope they inspire you to start on a new path…if you aren’t already there.
First, I found these two guys, Joshua Fields Millburn & Ryan Nicodemus. They had a really powerful TEDx talk, called, “A Rich life with Less Stuff.” (click on the hyper-link below) They also have a web site called, “TheMinimalist.com.
If you want some inspiration check out this video by The Minimalists, (A Rich life with less stuff)
And another one is with Angela Horn (I love her accent) called, “The less you own, the more you have.” This video REALLY resonated with me as she starts her talk reflecting on clearing out her mother and father’s family home. After my mom passed away 3 years ago this month, I started looking at all of my stuff with a new light and now ask myself, “what do I want to leave my kids to go through after I’m gone?”
Check out Angela’s videos below or better yet, this hyperlink to the TEDx talk she gave in Capetown……. “Less you own the more you have. In this video she shares the two steps that you need to make towards having more.
1) Clear the clutter
2) Stop buying new stuff
Well, enough said. Ha! When I think about minimalism, I want it to relate to EVERY aspect of my life. Not just stuff. I want less thoughts, more love and peace.
Will you join me in the ranks of people all over the world who are ditching the “Dream” and working in the direction of a simpler more fulfilling life? It starts with refusing to bring more stuff into your home, while working slowly through the belongings you do own. While you do, think about this, if this was your last day on earth, how would you want to spend it? With the stuff you own or with the people you love?
Are you in”
Stay tuned as I share some things that we will be doing around our home.
Until we meet again, may you be well, happy and peaceful.
Blessings from Hope